Documented Explorations of the Chaotic Mind





April is the month of intensity.

Everything you experience will be amplified times ten. GREAT.

As if that wasn't already happening.

But I find comfort in this. Last month was one of the most intense of my life, so bring it on. For those that aren't as in tune with the happenings of the cosmos and all that jazz, be warned. Things may get crazy this month. Just ride the wave. And shed that extra skin you don't need.

I am doing that both literally and figuratively right now.

A nasty sunburn turned into a tan over the weekend and yesterday I noticed how my skin was starting to peel. I had a strange thought as I peeled a layer off. Gross, I know. But I thought about how snakes shed their skin. Snakes shed their skin to allow for further growth and to remove parasites that may have attached to their old skin. The snake slithers out of their old skin like a sock! Now, we as humans grow with and into our skin, but the idea that we too shed some part of ourselves during growth is fascinating. We must shed the parts of ourselves that are no longer necessary in order to remove the harmful or unnecessary elements that hold us back from growing.

But the figurative part of my shedding process, I've made pretty clear. It has come to my attention recently that many agree on what happens as you get old. You shed the skin of your adolescent self, in order to embrace the shell of the adult version. As you accept the changes that come with maturing, you shed the weight of the issues, people, or insecurities of the past. The more you hone in on your happiness and your own choices, the finer the new skin becomes. You take care of it better. You preserve it. Which is what I have noticed. As my friends and I get older, I notice us all taking better care of ourselves. Sure, we hardly ever get it right for long (no offense gang), but we try harder. We commit more to 'wearing our new skin'. Yes, I'm aware all the skin shedding references are starting to sound creepy. But it's effective. It is painful and vulnerable to step out of the comfort zone, or the old shell, and to embrace that a new one is forming. But isn't that the beauty of transformation? Let's go old school and bring up the caterpillar. The caterpillar is no looker as he cocoons himself to become a beautiful butterfly. But it is still necessary and beautiful in its own right. It strips itself down to evolve into something bigger. Better. Beautiful.

Which brings me to what is coming. I have decided to move forward with a series I've had in the back of my mind for a long time. No it isn't THE series that is also making its way. It's more of a PSA, an installation, a performance piece.

It is called RAW.

And the premise is that people sit and answer questions about themselves as they shed layers of clothing, leaving them in their underwear. The power of shedding their clothing and leaving them in their raw form is an exciting and vulnerable experience. I did it myself and found how powerful it is to claim your own process. Maybe you take off your jewelry first. Maybe you go straight to the pants. Either way, it is a way for someone to expose themselves while also claiming their own perception of beauty. My hope is for the series to be somewhat connected with a site or organization that promotes inner beauty and the importance of self care, but until then, I will be posting the series here. I ask you to embrace the series with kindness, acceptance, compassion and love. It takes a lot to expose yourself and to mock or dismiss someone else willing to do it...well, let's just say it says more about you than it does about us.

My point is this: Virginia Wolff said, “Growing up is losing some illusions, in order to acquire others.” In order to obtain the software needed to mature and to expand your perceptions, you must shed and let go of the protective layer that we burrow into as innocents. Underneath all the layers is the rawest part. A snake slithers out of its old skin in one fall swoop. We as humans get to remove the layers piece by piece. Cherish the shedding process, it is liberating.